Geographers: Biobibliographical Studies, Volume 31

Wanderings of a Pilgrim in Search of the Picturesque. Djordje Ozbolt. 2nd September – 1st October The Penitent Saint Jerome acrylic on board

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Hedy Lamarr. Dan Zevin.

funny jokes about little johnny and hilarious stories

I'm worried I'm not. Terri Guillemets. Gloria Naylor. Jim Valvano. Reed Markham. To our family you are the world. Marinela Reka. Pam Brown. Umberto Eco. Ruth E. There's roughly one poop cleanup weekly, says Mark. And one more for piss -- when a panicked child asks you which way to the bathroom, it's even money that he'll take three steps before yelling "too late!

Major barf cleanups number about three per week. Matt recalls one Friday night when an especially creative kid threw up not on the floor, but into one of those water-shooting arcade machines. We've told you before how smelly and claustrophobic life can be inside a full-body mascot costume, and those were the costumes at Disney World -- the best of the best.

Little Johnny Jokes

With Chuck E. Cheese's, you'll get untrained teens donning the mask and, half-blind, running over little kids. As for dealing with that interior stink, management washes the thing somewhere between "rarely" and "never. Otherwise, they have to use Febreze, and most employees don't bother.

One of the most popular horror games of the last few years took place entirely in a thinly-veiled stand-in for a Chuck E. Cheese's, populated by killer animatronics. Well, that's it -- we have officially reached critical wuss levels as a species because, come on, how could anyone ever find the CEC robots scary in any shape or form?

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He always looked, I guess psychotic would be the best word, without the face. Like he just couldn't wait to tear from his bolts and start smashing people," and the really scary part is that this sort of thing does actually happen.

Key & Peele - Office Homophobe

So Chuck E. Another time his back actuator went out, which had him leaning way forward for his whole dance set. One song was heavy on the arm movements so he kept karate chopping and upper cutting the stage barrier, eventually busting it," like Johnny Five from Short Circuit if he was doing a cameo on Westworld. The only thing that kept Adam from burning his restaurant down with a holy, cleansing fire, was the fact that he got to humiliate the robots every once in awhile. I could almost get Chuckie's arms close enough to make a 'Fuck You' gesture, and of course, hip thrusting and imaginary ass slapping.

We're not sure what's the older joke: that casinos are Chuck E. Cheese's for adults or that Chuck E. Cheese's is a casino for kids. But with the second of these, at least, it might not be a joke at all. A couple of years ago, states started cracking down on cyber cafes with slots games , reasoning that these were just really shitty casinos in places casinos weren't allowed to operate -- kids pay to play the games, for the miniscule chance to win more than they spent.

When Florida passed a law banning gambling machines, the Miami Herald sent an investigator to Chuck E. Cheese's hopefully not wearing his trusty detective trench coat and the paper concluded that the machines there violate anti-gambling laws by any objective interpretation. Plush Time Wins. Asked for comment, Miami's mayor said, "I'm not going to go arrest Chuck E. Cheese in front of a bunch of six-year-olds. For example, one game has kids dropping in tokens hoping that a balance will topple and dislodge a ton of tokens.

Another game works similarly to roulette. Oh, and the machines take tokens or quarters, but the tokens cost 33 cents each. Parents buy tokens anyway, either because they don't know or because this feels more wholesome than having their kids beg them for actual money. That would be pretty remarkable if true, considering the two girls were aged five and three. Cheese's response was masterful: "1 Our machines are legal, and if they aren't, then 2 whoa girl, you just admitted to voluntarily participating in illegal gambling , which means you'll be going to jail! The house always wins, lady.

Heather S owes a lot to Chuck E. But feeling amused, we may be able to recognize and however begrudgingly accept that, overcome by lower instincts and desires, we're quite capable of being like that, talking like that, reacting like that. Our powerful, more animal side can preempt our better judgment or our higher ethical sensibilities.

Here, for example, are two witty but also rather cutting examples of how our sexual propensities may disclose things about us that, though comical, are hardly admirable. The first pokes fun at men, the second at women:. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz SL convertible. Anyhow, I hope you'll enjoy these quotations.

Still, I've little doubt that some readers will see me as failing in my attempts here.. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table. I went steady with a woodpecker till I was twenty-one. He replied frankly: 'because everything does.

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People should be very free with sex--they should draw the line at goats. But bad sex? A peanut butter and jelly sandwich is better than bad sex. In the nineteenth century, it was a disease; in the twentieth, it's a cure. The other is that sex is the most awful, filthy thing on earth, and you should save it for someone you love.

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If he knows anything about it, he shouldn't! Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke? The G-spot is in the ears. He who looks for it below there is wasting his time. She can't wait to disprove it. Do not have sex with the authorities. Edgar Hoover. After the first 20 minutes, I never want to screw again as long as I live. If pornography is a crime , when will they arrest makers of perfume? It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection.

236 Hilarious Yearbook Quotes That Are Impossible Not To Laugh At

As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection is the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted. This reading this article has given me the most laughs I've had on this website! Great job with the selection!

I'm pretty sure ""You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither. The source I used ascribed it to Drew Carey, as have a few others.